How to get a good session when the mood strikes — Reflections of a life gone by: An advice column I wrote 20 years ago when I ran an adult ad agency selling media space to prostitutes. Ya know…being an adult industry ad rep isn’t the walk in the park most guys would imagine. Like…all day…I have women screaming at me…

Working suicide watch at MCC federal prison with Jeffrey Epstein — To nobody’s surprise, prison is a place and experience which often propels its inmates on a downward spiral to the depths of anxiety and depression. Well aware of this problem, prison administrators have designated programs to handle inmates who’ve reached rock bottom and want to end it all. Suicidal inmates…

Get the best bang for your advertising buck with Dollar Bill — I know. I’m certainly not the first guy to name himself Dollar Bill. And I won’t be the last. But the slogan worked for my advertising agency. And my real name was William — which in my mind, legitimized the hackneyed old moniker. So anyway…I was born in the New…

And I’m not alone — Once upon a time, 65 was the benchmark age for retirees. Pretty much nobody worked after they reached that age. And in fact, when the federal government negotiated their plea deal with me, I’m sure they assumed that at age 70 (how old I’d be when they finally sprung me…

But now unemployed — Here in New York City, we have a local Spectrum Cable tv station called New York 1. It’s a progressive, liberal, and award-winning presentation that features local news in an intelligent and artful way and actually, one of the few of the gazillion stations Spectrum offers that I watch. Given…

Lock her up! — Cardi B, ex-stripper and questionable musical talent, has finally pleaded out to charges following two separate incidents at a strip club in Flushing, Queens. Accused by the authorities of 12 different crimes, Cardi and her money bought the best representation available — and the end result was predictable: a slap…

(I don’t care where you went to college.) — I’m neither proud nor ashamed to admit I’m a huge fan of American NFL professional football. But one thing that totally annoys me to death on virtually every televised pro football game is the network's snippets of the starting players telling the viewers their names and where they went to…

But it feels like yesterday — The moment came when I was about 16 years old. Dad had come on one of his semi-annual visits to check out his second son from marriage #1. To say my father parented from afar would be an accurate appraisal of his vigilance in that arena. When dad lived with…

MAP’s aren't pedophiles — Once upon a time, you could call retards retards. But no more. Now you have to call them mentally challenged people. Ditto for cripples. Now they’re invalids. Even the word “Oriental” became pejorative. Now you must use the term “Asian” lest you offend the “woke” among us. Enter a Texas…