Oh my god! I can’t believe what I just read from my emailed digest. The story is all about the last frontier of body-shaming. A woman posted a picture of herself on Instagram in a bathing suit that revealed the biggest, phattest, and most delicious set of breasts I’ve ever seen on a 50 plus-year-old woman. Somebody added a smarmy comment — and then others jumped in. She was devastated.

Ok! If she’d been on the other end of the spectrum and somebody commented “do you wear a bra or a thimble?” — and then more people jumped in, I…

To nobody’s surprise, prison is a place and experience which often propels its inmates on a downward spiral to the depths of anxiety and depression. Well aware of this problem, prison administrators have designated programs to handle inmates who’ve reached rock bottom and want to end it all.

Suicidal inmates were certainly not a rarity where I stayed. Guys threatened to “hang up” (the colloquial expression used for suicide) on a more or less routine basis.

As such, the prison had a mini tier of suicide cells down on the second floor. Four of them in fact. And somebody had…

I know. I’m certainly not the first guy to name himself Dollar Bill. And I won’t be the last. But the slogan worked for my advertising agency. And my real name was William — which in my mind, legitimized the hackneyed old name.

So anyway…I was born in the New York City area to educated parents both of whom graduated from Columbia University. …

When I watch the present day Olympics, I’m starting to feel like that parent who wants to know why every kid in the little league gets a trophy. It used to be that competitors cried when they came in second and got a shitty silver medal. The attitude being: I fucking lost. This sucks!

That seems to be over now. Silver and bronze medalists bask in the glow as if they’re number one. No, you’re not. You got beat. You wanted to be the best in the world — and you failed.

Take Simone Biles. She folded under pressure —…

His name was Dan — and he was one of the first inmates I met upon arriving at MCC federal prison to serve a year. Dan was 52 years old and as I found out, a white-collar offender who ran a commodities trading club. When all his friends' investments went south, Dan generated a fake report to save face and got himself locked up for two or three years.

It wasn’t long before I decided Dan was kind of a douchebag. He wasn’t about owning his crime — and asked a lot of unenlightened questions about the escort business. (He…

I read a lot on the subject of what women want in prospective mates and how guys should go about finding a woman of their choice (it’s in my digest) that tends to complicate the situation. It’s just not all that profound. Just my opinion, mind you.

Once you get by the obvious stuff guys who score tons of women boast (handsome, built, rich, hung) — but most guys don’t have — there are some tried and true ways for an average guy to attract a woman who eventually wants to be his mate. …

Recently, I’ve been seeing a lot of women’s Tinder profiles reading “check my last photo.” This kind of flies in the face of a dating site that’s based on instant knee-jerk reactions to photos. It’s a smash or dash setup not geared to having viewers linger — or even move on past the first photo. I know that it’s only in a minority of cases that I even get past photo #1.

Still, if that “check my photo” teaser actually prompts you to move to the caboose, you will almost always find a come-on for massages — often with “extras”…

She called herself Star 69. And I gave her the ad tag line “with the big behind.” She was kind of a cute childlike 20-something girl whose pimp wanted her to be “escort of the month” in my silly magazine.

The pimp himself was really just a US postman. One of his colleagues who was operating big time in the pimp world convinced him to take the plunge. But “The Captain” wasn’t really cut out for pimping. He just wasn’t an evil predator like that. In fact, Star used to tell me The Captain was a “soft pimp.” …